Days Of Our Lives....

Life seems to pass you by very fast when you're not thinking about it, it was only Monday yesterday, today its Wednesday, and tommorrow is Friday. Shit, talk about a week...and what am i going to do this non-existent Thursday?

Sit in an air-conditioned class room from 8 to 9.30, then go for tea break, then sit in the same bloody class room, until 12.30 for lunch, then comeback to the SAME SHITTY classroom and sit until 3.30, then go for tea break, then later GO HOME AT 5.30.

Is that boring or what.....walau eh!

But its ok lah, at least i can rest in the class ( a.k.a. close my eyes and pretend to be listening to the earphones)

C.O.A is coming to camp on friday ( Chief of Army for all you sotong civillians ), a MG ( Major General, a.k.a. 2 stars, a.k.a. VERY VERY VERY BIG BOSS ). so we have a lot of cleaning to do and stuff. Saikang work loh!

Thus my shoulder is 11 weeks away from getting 2 chevrons.....finally shit right. Anyway, thinking of staying as an instructor...not bad life...i think.

This is for Anna:

Power Of Pain
by Star711
I sat alone another day.

The world was moving all around me,but it seemed as if my life was in a standstill.

The doctors say its anxiety.

Everyone thinks anxiety means nervousness or fear,but it is deeper than that.

Anxiety holds you prisoner.

You can't leave your house.

Ding

Dong

Ding

Dong

The doorbell rings but I can't answer.

There is too much fear inside.

You can't answer the phone.

Ring

Ring

Ring

"Telephone for you!" my family yells.

Itell them to say that I will call back, but I won't.

You can't eat.

Chomp

Bite

Chew

No, not me.

The anxiety even controls that.

All the pain rushes back up withevery little thing I eat.

You can't go out.

Step

Step

Step

Everyone walking around me, but I can't move, the apprehension paralyzes me.

Everyone says, "Be brave. You can do it.

You'll make it out of this."

But sometimes I wonder if I will.

I try to combat it all, but if I attempt to do anything,it all starts over again.

Thump

Thump

Thump

My heart beats faster and faster.

I can feel it in my chest.

Beads of sweat

Racing

Falling

Running down my forehead.

All the thoughts swarm in my brain.

The fear picks up.

It is unbearable.

I'm so frightened, but I don't know what of.

The paranoia sweeps over my body like a giant wave.

Every day I have to fight what seems to be a losing battle.

But then . . . I look outside.

I see the colors.

I see the life.

I see spirit.

I know I can do this.

Hope

Pray

Win